Two countries united by a common past, and divided by it

1947 marks a year of independence for India and Pakistan; from the British rule, and unfortunately, from one another. A partition that devastated an entire subcontinent, killing hundreds of thousands of people, and displacing nearly fifteen million, left bitter memories and simmering hatred in its wake. On August 15, 1947, one country, rich, diverse, colorful, and shared, became two countries with ever-entwined souls.

For two years now, I've sat awake until midnight on August 14, aware that I'm straddling two extremely important parallel events in India and Pakistan's history, their independence days (Pakistan celebrates theirs on August 14, while India celebrates on August 15). I've wondered about all the people who witnessed the anger, revenge, and murder of loved ones and those who made it to the other side sans any of their belongings. This important period of our combined history is spoken about much less often than other unfortunate massacres and genocides, but it is such a critical reminder of what religious fanaticism and mob-mentality can lead to. Throughout the partition, bloodshed and violence marred what used to be a peaceful coexistence and nothing was the same. Millions of people were affected by this immense tragedy and their stories might never reach generations who can learn from what they went through.

As it turns out, this might not be the case. Not if the 1947 Partition Archive can help it. This wonderful and much-needed initiative is a people-powered non-profit organization dedicated to documenting, preserving and sharing eye witness accounts from all ethnic, religious and economic communities affected by the Partition of British India in 1947. They provide a platform for anyone anywhere in the world to collect, archive and display oral histories that document not only Partition, but pre-Partition life and culture as well as post-Partition migrations and life changes. They are dedicated to bringing knowledge about the Partition into widespread public consciousness through creative and scholarly expression and their collected works are being made available in limited capacity via their online Story Map. Their videos are poignant compilations of a forgotten past.

As an Indian, growing up, Pakistan was akin to a distant uncle I'd occasionally hear about. Someone I had never met but knew I was related to; someone familiar, yet unknown. Pakistan was unlike any other country, and Pakistanis unlike any other foreigners. I was especially convinced of this when I hosted two amazing girls from Pakistan over two summers who quickly became like family. I was excited by our similarities and enjoyed discovering our differences. Over time, the number of Pakistanis I call friends has only increased. And with each new friend, I can't deny that I've found a comfort and ease that you'd normally find with your own countrymen. I'm glad that initiatives like the 1947 Partition Archive and even Coke's Small World Machines ad identify, highlight, and celebrate the bond between the two countries.

The US Gun Debate: An afternoon spent at a church

Self Defense. I realized a few months ago that these two words have very different meanings for different people, and a varying degree of importance too. To be honest, it isn’t something I had ever given much thought. Not until I found myself sitting in a church on a Sunday morning utterly engrossed in a debate on ‘God and Guns’.

When I heard that my housemate, Martha, a priest at the nearby Episcopal Church, was participating in a debate about guns, I was instantly intrigued. The night before the debate, as she narrated part of her core argument against guns, her pacifist attitude was apparent and I found myself nodding vigorously in agreement with everything she was saying.

The next morning, as I walked to the church where the debate was taking place, I was certain that as someone who had been shocked, saddened, and afraid after the innumerable mindless shootings across the US in the past few years, my personal position was to impose strict licensing and re-licensing rules, curbing widespread ownership. I admit that this was from a very limited understanding of the breadth and depth of the issue and sprung primarily from my belief in non-violence. This was before I met the young, brave girl who spoke about the “other” side of the gun debate; before a new face and context was put before me. I can’t say that what followed after I entered the church and heard multiple conflicting viewpoints changed my mind entirely, but it most definitely led me to ask myself a few very important (and difficult) questions I had otherwise never considered.

My first impression of Catherine was that she was just a few years older than me. I suppose I automatically assumed that the pro-gun speaker would be someone old. Someone orthodox, conservative, and unlike me. But Catherine wasn’t. She and her husband had recently experienced a traumatic break-in where they, being gun owners, were brought face to face with the possibility of shooting someone in self defense. That was her story and a large part of her reasons to support the Second Amendment stemmed from it.

Since the debate was on how guns and violence were perceived in the Bible, she began by interpreting the sixth commandment, ‘Thou shall not kill’ and stating that it referred to murder which was different from justified killing. She went on to talk about Martin Luther King, saying that even he, despite his adamant non-violent stance, had once applied for a permit to carry a concealed handgun. UCLA law professor Adam Winkler had also noted that, after King’s house was bombed in 1956, he had applied in Alabama for a concealed carry permit. He was denied permission, but had armed watchmen to guard against further assassination attempts. It is said that King made a distinction between people using guns to defend themselves in the home and the question of “whether it was tactically wise to use a gun while participating in an organized protest.”

After Martha and Catherine had spoken for a while, a European human rights activist in her late thirties requested the mic to speak. She looked genuinely perplexed as she echoed some of my own thoughts and questions. She began by sharing that, given her background, nationality, and upbringing it was truly difficult for her to fathom ‘gun-ownership’ as a fundamental right. She explained that countries around the world, including those who considered freedom and safety as foremost priorities, were able to control crime and violence without individual gun ownership. She said that to her, as a devout Christian, the most important thing for her was salvation – her own and her attacker’s.

An older gentleman insisted that gun owners were the main reason for the problem of violence and wars. To this, Catherine calmly explained that there is a huge difference between war and self defense. She and others who agreed with her insisted that they were strong proponents of non-violent resolutions of disputes but in situations where that wasn’t an option, they would not hesitate to lift a weapon to protect someone they love.

A domestic violence victim, relating the horror she went through during the years of her marriage, shared that she understood both sides of the coin and often wonders what her own personal belief is. Regardless, she offered that she knew for a fact that in the heat of the moment, when someone is aggressively and constantly putting you in harm’s way, the urge to fight back and protect yourself (even to kill the perpetrator) can be extremely overpowering. It’s human nature, she said.

Respectfully, some who held a strong anti-gun position shared that at times, couples fail to resolve marital conflicts by seeking proper platforms or outlets like a counselor or trusted third person. Often, they resort to violence and in moments of anger, powerlessness, and desperation, and a gun lying handy can and has lead to fatal “mistakes”. They insisted that in the very least, gun ownership should be highly curbed and regulated by including regular mental check-ups and frequent decertifications. One of them also mentioned that if she had a gun in her home, it wouldn’t make her feel more secure but rather, it would make her live in constant fear. (To this, Martha also added the importance of the discipline and practice of continuing to examine our fears, a challenge that is what makes us human. Guns may give us power which may lead to a false sense of security but ultimately, it is essentially superficial and the fear still lurks beneath. If there were no guns, perhaps we’d be forced to deal with conflicts differently, perhaps more humanly?)

These excerpts are only a portion of the extensive conversation that took place that morning and I was truly amazed and pleased to see how honestly and respectfully such a sensitive topic had been approached by everyone present. While I wasn’t swayed to support Catherine’s position by the end of it, I definitely understood her perspective better and could even empathize with her and her husband. Most importantly though, the conversation touched me as it led me to wonder whether I would ever pick up a weapon to defend someone I love. And if I did, how would I ever be able to live with myself knowing that I took someone’s life? Our actions have consequences and I don’t think I would be able to live with those that would follow an action as permanent, reckless, and fatal as gun violence.

Dancing with yourself, how to talk to statues, and what squirrels have to do with love.

The idea of being alone is disconcerting. The reality of it, challenging. As someone who has spent the better part of last year battling loneliness and trying hard to embrace it, this video spoke to me. It is beautiful and eloquent and gives me hope that someday I will be able to fully appreciate my own company as effortlessly and gracefully as I'd like. Someday, I'll surrender to all the non-human stimuli that surround me, reaching out eagerly, not cautiously. Someday, abstraction will give way to empiricism and I'd have last year to thank for helping me build a way to true self-reliance.

http://www.brainpickings.org/index.php/2010/08/16/how-to-be-alone/

 

Back to the basics

It doesn't surprise me that a U.S. company is prototyping an anti-rape underwear for women, in the same way that it doesn't surprise me when a rape survivor's clothes and reason for being where she was is questioned more than the rapist's identity and the horrific act of violence itself. It is one of the dumbest things I've read (for reasons correctly elucidated in this Think Progress article) but that isn't saying much given the volume of ridiculous comments, arguments, and suggestions that constantly emerge around the topic.

As always, while it doesn't surprise me, it does make me angry. When did we as a species so completely (and seemingly irreversibly) lose the plot? I realize that that's a stupid question in a world where actions that breed hatred and aggression continue at an alarming scale and intensity but it frustrates me no end that somewhere in this complex mess of orthodox beliefs, baseless convictions, and misappropriated superiority we've become accustomed to a complete disregard for what is fundamentally right and wrong. The problem at hand is not complicated. The root causes, manifestations, and systems are, yes, but the problem itself is not. Force, aggression, and a violation of human dignity is wrong regardless of the context and situation and it is always the fault of the perpetrator. Dig deeper and it's the fault of the society, upbringing, and conditioning. Similarities emerge across all these, but never across those who have been raped. Defense classes, pepper sprays, rape whistles, and anti-rape underwear are all band-aid solutions which, despite good intentions, shift focus from interventions that have proven far more effective and long-lasting. I don't have a problem with the products themselves but with the shortsightedness with which their connotations and inevitable harm on social fabrics and mindsets are ignored.

This post isn't to delve into theories of rape-culture. It is to point out that unless we begin diagnosing the issue correctly and seeing it squarely for what it is, we are not going to get any closer to solving it.

A few weeks after I wrote the above post, an article was published titled 'Why selling anti-rape wear perpetuates victim-blaming' that echoed my thoughts and articulated the problem perfectly. It has some interesting examples and captures the issue well.

Fighting Guns with Books

“Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.” – Martin Luther King, Jr.

A standing ovation and thunderous applause welcomed Malala Yousafzai on stage at the Social Good Summit in New York on Sept 23. The energy in the room was palpable and unlike any other panel yet. What followed were twenty minutes of sheer inspiration and even a few emotional moments.

Malala was accompanied by her father, Ziauddin Yousafzai and friend and CEO of the Malala Fund, Shiza Shahid, and the three were joined on stage by Elizabeth Gore of the United Nations Foundation. This panel was special to me not because of the uniqueness of the topic but because of the uniqueness with which the topic was approached. This time, the simplicity not complexity of words, concepts, and ideas is what made the audience reflect. Here was a girl who had been fighting for her right to study for years, speaking out against a system that no one else dared to provoke, and who understood the far-reaching positive impact of education better than most others in her region of the world. Here was a girl who paid a heavy and unfair price for her bravery but instead of nursing feelings of revenge and anger, only grew more resolute and committed. She believes that a book and a pen are much more powerful than guns and tanks. And she is right. I was left wondering why things that are so obvious to this 16 year old girl are incomprehensible to so many individuals around the world.

What stayed with me most afterward was something Malala’s father Ziauddin said. On being asked about the role he has played in his daughter’s life, he said, “Too many young girls have their wings clipped – they aren’t allowed to live or be free. The only thing I did was accept her as an individual and let her be free.” There was something so simple and yet profound about this. While it seems like the most basic thing and was dismissed by him as the “only thing” he did, it is actually the most important. It is often the missing link. Too many parents around the world fail to look at their daughters as deserving the same independence, opportunities, and support as their sons. Malala’s father is an example for parents around the world who need to learn to look at their daughters as individuals, to respect and encourage them to be who they are. If more people followed Ziauddin’s lead, they would unleash the potential of a million Malalas.

Ziauddin also insisted that terrorists are against everything that stands for civilization and culture. They thrive in the darkness caused by illiteracy. Ziauddin’s faith in the power of education to spread light and opportunities was clearly passed on to his daughter. Malala concluded by saying, “Every thing that is a reality now, was once a dream. And so I dream that every girl around the world will be educated, and if we all work toward it, this too will become a reality.”. It was unreal standing so close to her and her conviction, passion, and commitment were evident and contagious. This is a girl who the Taliban couldn't silence. This is a girl who will help children around the world have a brighter future.

This blog was originally published here on the Plus Social Good website.

Tell Us What You Think: #2030Now

Tell Us What You Think: #2030Now

  Throughout the Social Good Summit, we'll be asking you for your opinion on some key questions. Take our survey now, and we'll report back on what we hear.

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Violence Against Women: Let's Talk Solutions

Several weeks ago, like many others around the world, I too read RoseChasm's account of her experience in India. I felt a range of emotions as I read what she had to say. Anger, shame, frustration, familiarity, disgust. It was saddening, but not shocking. I knew it would take the internet by storm (at least for a few weeks), but for me, it was one more sour story in an ever-growing pile. A poignant echo, reminiscent of too many others.

When I discussed it with a friend that evening, my mind immediately went to my past eight months in the US. I've had my share of concerns here but none of them have revolved around whether or not my outfit is appropriate for a walk to the grocery store, or a ride on the local bus. It is a relief to not have men look at your bare legs like something to devour, or in a way that would leave you feeling dirty, disgusted, and disturbed. I have to admit, it is strangely liberating to not have to worry about those things, and even as I type this, I realize that it's a feeling that too many women in India (and around the world for that matter) will spend their lives not knowing.

As my friend, who is an American, listened to my animated rant about the status quo, he asked me simply, "What is the reason for this? Why does it happen?" I began to tell him, but I grew more and more frustrated as I struggled to piece it all together. His question stayed with me for a long time.

Why are Indian men ogling, molesting, eve-teasing, and raping women? Why is something that is so obviously abhorrent to everyone else, second nature to the shameless and arrogant Indian man?

We know the reasons. We've hashed them out over the years, through innumerable blogs and articles, and we've talked about them at protests and round table discussions. We know that, very broadly, patriarchy, illiteracy, poor parenting and upbringing, an absence of good role models, an untrustworthy police force, judicial loopholes, bad governance, lack of accountability, and several other such factors have contributed to the state of affairs. These aren't 'current' state of affairs - they've existed for decades, but they're finally being laid out bare. Now there's a desire for change and a clearer understanding of root causes by a larger portion of the population than ever before. This group can come together to transform a society that mutely accepts and reproduces miscreants to one that is able to stand up and defend the dignity of its people. All of its people.

So how do we go about solving something so massive, interconnected, and deep-rooted, that it often seems hard to fathom and impossible to navigate? Before I share my thoughts, I want to highlight a few of the responses that followed RoseChasm's account. There have been a spate of "pro-India" articles advising against stereotyping and generalizing, as well as many comments from Indians apologizing, sympathizing, and sharing their own personal stories. I respect and agree with a lot that has been written and so, as an Indian who is both proud and patriotic, as well as fed up and angry, I feel the need to state my position.

While I agree that painting all of India with one broad 'anti-women' stroke is unfair and incorrect, I choose to generalize 'Indian men' in this piece for the sake of making connections between behavior, culture, and socialization. I was groped by a stranger inside a subway in New York a few months ago, for the first and only time in my life, and I understand that sexual harassment is (unfortunately) a global phenomenon. Despite that, for the sake of highlighting the sheer volume and range of attacks in India and the various manifestations of gender inequality, as well as finding solutions that are India-specific, I am approaching this as an 'India problem'. I have met hundreds of wonderful, honorable, "non-stereotypical" Indian men who condemn misogyny and patriarchy. I know they exist, but my focus is on the millions who need to join the movement to shame deviants and oppose uncivilized behavior - those who are still silent.

India is diverse, conservative, extreme, stubborn, and skeptical. It is also young, energized, hopeful, ambitious, modern, and passionate. It's tricky to find a balance between these two Indias, but that is where the solution lies. India's rich culture and heritage should be celebrated and respected, but no longer in its entirety. There are aspects of our culture that need to be weeded and replaced, and this can only be done by a younger India that can see beyond hierarchies of caste, class, and gender.

The following list is in no way exhaustive, but it is a start. These aren't even solutions necessarily, but topics that I believe can spark conversations that result in solutions for a new India.

1. You're never too young to start learning respect - Unhealthy relationships between a boy and girl, and corresponding superior/inferior attitudes begin at a very young age. This is one of the most fundamental reasons for sexual violence. For generations, children have been conditioned to discriminate. Boys and girls emulate conventional gender roles that they see in their own households, and this behavior is prompted and reinforced by constant verbal cues. It is magnified when a boy's violent or condescending behavior toward a girl is ignored at his school or dismissed as playful banter. If he's growing up thinking it's okay to treat girls disrespectfully, then it's a failure of the entire system. We all know parents, and we all know teachers. We could start there. One person at a time.
2. Replace sexual entitlement with sexual autonomy - In a recent survey conducted by the UN, 70-80% of the rapists interviewed cited sexual entitlement as their reason for doing it. These respondents were not from India but it is no secret that universally, rape is usually an act of exerting power and dominance. In an earlier blog post, I mentioned how archaic traditions and beliefs have led to sexual autonomy for women (and as a result the right to say no) becoming an alien concept for most Indian men. This too needs to be addressed during the formative years. The entire socialization process needs to be transformed so that parents are not only good role models for children by dispelling gender stereotypes, but are also actively talking to their children (especially boys) about healthy sexual behavior that does not include objectification of women. Finn Wightman excellently articulates what every boy needs to hear growing up. Indian parents would not be comfortable having this exact conversation with their children, but there are several other ways to go about it while still getting the same message across.
3. Our understanding of violence and protection - I overheard two things at the protests in December last year that need to be pointed out. The first was someone saying "Rape hua, haan, par jis bhayanak tarah hua, woh bohot dukh ki baat hai" (The rape happened, yes, but the brutal manner in which it happened is very upsetting). We have to stop being a society whose degree of tolerance is proportionate to its perceived degree of severity/brutality of the crime. Rape is rape. It is as much a violation of human dignity in a closed room as it is on a moving train. There are several forms of violence, and there is nothing innocent about 'eve-teasing' even if it doesn't result in rape. It is important to speak up against even the so-called "harmless" forms of harassment like ogling and "accidental groping". It is not okay for half the population to live in constant fear in the presence of the opposite sex. The second thing I heard was a group of men saying the slogan "Save our daughters, save our sisters!" While it was well-intended, the approach is completely wrong since viewing a woman only in relation to her father, brother, or son only propagates patriarchy. We've failed to look at a woman as an individual in this country, detached from traditional roles, for centuries. That's fundamental to respect. Recently, India criminalized voyeurism, stalking, and acid attacks. While it is a significant step forward, there is still a lot to be done. Marital rape is still not a crime, and security forces have legal immunity for sexual assault. Both are grossly under reported.
4. The other half - Notice how the focus of most discussions related to sexual violence, including patronizing or outright condescending remarks, has always been women? It is possibly the only crime in which we spend more time talking about the survivor than the culprit. Why? Because of the lack of gender ambiguity. Since most rape cases are committed by men, the upholders of our flawed patriarchal social fabric take it upon themselves to string together as many illogical reasons as they can to defend them, almost as if its a personal attack. When Eve Ensler was in Delhi last year, a man on the panel with her said something that was simultaneously simple and profound. He said "for every woman that has been raped, there is a man (or men) who is a rapist. Let's focus on him." If we just turn the whole thing around, if we talk to all the men we know, who talk to all the men that they know, who talk to all the men they know, eventually you're reaching those who are likely to act violently. You're separated from them by fewer degrees than you think. It is SO important to involve men in this fight. Even those that would never commit the crime themselves. So instead of saying that "25,000 cases of rape were reported in India in 2012", let's say it the way it really is - At least 25,000 men in India used violence to force a woman to have sex with them without her consent.
5. Reclaim public spaces - In an interview, Flavia Agnes said "The answer is not to keep women inside, but to have more women on the streets and to have a more open environment." And of course, she's right. A recent report "Invisible Women" by Shilpa Phadke, Shilpa Ranade and Sameera Khan argues that women will not be safe until we have infrastructural changes in everything from public transport to public toilets. Countries like Vienna have successfully incorporated gender mainstreaming into city planning and India has a lot to learn and do in this regard. Things as simple as well-lit roads go a long way in making a city safer for women (as one of, and not the only initiative, of course). Gender mainstreaming in social policy or urban planning is still a distant reality for us but we can start small. It's easier for some of us to reclaim public spaces than for others. Let's think about ways in which we can do this while empowering other women to do the same.
6. Openly condemn the hypocrisy - Be aware of it, expose it, and lead by example. Whether it's the hypocrisy of citizens who identify themselves as middle and upper class/caste and dismiss sexual violence as a lower class/caste problem, or the exasperating hypocrisy (and irrationality) of moral policing and honor killings. I wrote about it in a previous blog post. It's mindless, it's ingrained, and it's conveniently tweaked and used by perpetrators who are experts in misinterpretation (read: politicians, police officers, panchayat heads, etc). It stares us in the face everyday and it won't go away overnight but we have to point it out and be very very careful that we aren't perpetuating it in any way.
7. We are the system - We demand systemic change all the time without realizing that we are what makes the system. One of the biggest tragedies in India is that the current political and judicial system do far more to repulse young Indians than to attract them. If these systems worked ethically, it would change the face of the country. It is up to us to persevere, to dissect, and overturn every single thing we see going wrong in this bureaucratic mess, from bribery to sexism. It's far from easy but it needs to be done because while attitudes and kyriarchy form one half of this puzzle, law and order, and governance form the other.
8. Everyone can be a part of the solution - With more and more people from all works of life realizing that creating a new and equal India is their responsibility too, the movement is growing every day. Some incredible projects have caught my attention over the past few months that serve as an inspiration to all those who want to get involved or start their own initiative. The Red Brigade and Jagaran India are two such initiatives.
9. Persevere - Let's face it. It'll be a long time till there's substantial change in attitudes but there's no denying that it will happen. It has to. And when it does, we won't be telling our daughters that they can't walk/drive alone after 8 p.m. or that they need an escort to help them do their job. 

Women have been consistently ill-treated in the name of tradition in our country, through practices like sati, child marriage, dowry, and female foeticide and infanticide to honor killings and moral policing. There is no denying that it is a complex and sensitive issue and there are always a ton of people to hurl abuses at or blame for the way things are. But it's time we get together to realize that things will change when we make them. This country and its women deserve better. Enough is enough.

Justice Verma Committee and the Anti-Rape Law in India

A friend who is interning at the Center for Civil Society recently carried out a survey to garner people's opinions on some of the controversial recommendations made by the Justice Verma Committee. The recommendations, questions, and my responses are below.

Voluntary Chemical Castration (Chapter 9 - Sentencing and Punishment)

Background:

The report points out that in the 'UK, sex offender treatment programs sometimes offer chemical castration... to convicted sex offenders as a form of psychiatric treatment. This is done in consultation with doctors and psychiatrists with the consent of the sex offender.' (Pg no: 252, Para no: 41)

'It is important to understand that unlike surgical castration, the effects of chemical castration are temporary and therefore repeated monitored doses at regular intervals is a necessary prerequisite' (Pg no: 251, para no: 39)

Q: Is this a valid punitive suggestion for Sexual Assault (Rape) Cases in India?

A: A few years ago, I would've said yes to this question but I've thought about it a lot and I don't think it's valid in the Indian context. I don't know how these decisions are made for sure, but what I do know is that the Indian judicial system is plagued by corruption and loopholes. Castration will be offered in return for reducing the jail term (something that has been seen in many countries). Since it is something that requires regular doses, it is going to be very easy for sex offenders to bribe their way out of their next dose. Ultimately, the person will get away with both a strict jail term and castration. Secondly, chemical castration uses drugs to reduce sex drive. To me, that is like saying "You raping someone didn't have to do with your inability to control your urges, your lack of respect for another human being or your inability to differentiate between right and wrong. It occurred because of something purely biological - which we will now treat." This falls under the same category as victim blaming for me. The sex offender needs to learn that he isn't entitled to instant sexual gratification, not have his life made easier by removing the urges altogether. That's an easy way out. Lastly, when decisions regarding punishments for the Delhi rapists were being made, there were ridiculous talks about the severity and brutality of the rape and how that should determine the punishment. Of course the Delhi rape was horrific, but does that imply that there's a less scarring, less disgusting form of rape and in those cases the culprit can get away with milder punishment? I fear that our highly incompetent and flawed system (for the most part) will never be able to decide who should and should not be castrated, and it will delay justice for many many months/years.

Medical Examination (Chapter 11 Medico-Legal Examination)

Background:

'Medical examination of a rape/sexual assault victim must necessarily take place under the supervision of a senior female obstetrician/gynecologist.' (Pg.no: 278, Para no: 15)

Q: Is it feasible to propose that ‘in order to ensure that there is a consensus of opinion on the medical examination, a board of three doctors must examine a rape/sexual assault victim.'?

A: The rape victim has just undergone a major trauma and has probably had to muster a lot of courage to speak out. Increasing the number of doctors will just make it more intimidating and traumatizing. I know the current system isn't working very well, so instead can't we work on making the process better, more effective and less invasive? The focus should also be on training doctors really well so that they are mindful, considerate and do everything they can to make the victim comfortable and safe. The two-finger test has been in the news a lot over the past few months. I'm not sure if it was finally banned 100% so if it wasn't then that should be done.

Community Policing (Chapter 12 Police Reforms)
Background: 'To augment the police force, there is need to develop community policing by involving the local population.' (Pg No: 338, Para no: J)

Q: Do you think it is feasible to appoint a 'Respectable persons in each locality as a Special Executive Magistrates (under Section 21, Cr.P.C.) and invested power to deal with the traffic offenses and other minor offenses including eve-teasing.'

A: I'm not at all sure of what this entails but I'm saying yes because I think there's a definite need to empower and sensitize the local population to speak up. The ignorance, apathy, and unwillingness to oppose some of the most common offenses is shocking. I don't know if the best way to do that is to "appoint" someone because once it's systematized, chances of misusing power and corruption increase. Plus, "Special Executive Magistrates" is an awful, bureaucratic title which makes very little sense to a common citizen. I also have a problem with the phrase "to augment the police force". The issue will not be resolved by increasing the number but by increasing the quality of training and level of commitment to the job. Our police force has continually let us down. The existing force NEEDS to be better trained so they understand that they are responsible for people's safety and need to speak to people with respect; not be on a power trip and unapproachable like they currently are.

Curriculum Change (Chapter 7 Child Sexual Abuse)
Background:

'The ideas of gender roles which is firmly embedded in the psyche of the Indian male needs to be now psychologically reconstructed on rational lines in the context of relationship with society and with women and particularly respect and equality towards women.' (Pg no: 214, Para no: 30)

Q. Should there be 'a improvisation in the school curriculum which must involve the subject of what are called as “Social science- Practical Applications'?

A: Definitely. Again, I'm not sure what the report is proposing specifically but I completely agree that the current curriculum propagates conventional gender stereotypes and roles and that must change. In addition to adding a subject, I think teachers also need to be trained so that 1) they don't say or do things which are discriminatory, and 2) they make sure that children develop healthy relationships and opinions about the opposite gender in all spheres and activities, not only during the one hour of 'Social Science: Practical Applications'. Specifically, books for elementary school children currently show women sitting by the stove, cooking, and men leaving for office. This needs to be updated!

For more information on the Justice Verma Committee Report -

http://www.thehindu.com/news/resources/full-text-of-justice-vermas-report-pdf/article4339457.ece

http://www.ndtv.com/article/cheat-sheet/recommendations-of-the-justice-verma-committee-10-point-cheat-sheet-321734

Comfort is Overrated

Growing up, children are often told they should study hard so they can get a good job and "lead a comfortable life." Here's what I've discovered over the past few years though: Comfort is overrated. Don't get me wrong; I have nothing against studying hard or getting a good job, but my problem lies in the fact that unfortunately and often unconsciously, comfort becomes interchangeable with monotony. And the prospect of finding comfort in knowing exactly how the next few months (or years or decades) of my life will look is something that not only bores me, it actually scares me.

A few years ago, during my first solo travel abroad, across Turkey, the above discovery led to a subsequent one: the perfect antidote to a monotonous life is acknowledging that there is a vast, unknown world out there, and setting out to explore it. If you have ever danced with locals on the streets of a country that is not your own, or have prepared a traditional meal for a foreigner using your grandmother's secret recipe, then you know that nothing can compare to the thrill and excitement of that moment when a stranger becomes a friend. Geographical boundaries often define the confines of our mind and transcending them to embrace the unknown is liberating. By stepping out of your comfort zone in this way, you can unleash unlimited possibilities and discover the most fundamental joys.

Four months ago, my love for traveling, my desire to grow as a nonprofit professional and my belief in the value of stepping out of my comfort zone led me to pack my bags and move to the United States. I arrived with two suitcases, a year's worth of Indian spices and an open mind, nervous but excited to make a new place my home for a year, and new friends for a lifetime. I had been a citizen diplomat long before I knew it was called that, and I was about to spend a year discovering and sharing the joys of being one.

Every day as the Membership and Outreach Coordinator at the U.S. Center for Citizen Diplomacy, I learn about new ways in which organizations and individuals are facilitating intercultural dialogue and understanding. These powerful stories of cooperation and friendship inspire me in a world where stories of war, intolerance and conflict are so common. My own personal journey has been enriching and exciting. Each conversation and interaction has taught me a little more about the world and myself. It has led me to realize that citizen diplomacy is about wondering, learning and understanding. It is about challenging our opinions and overcoming our prejudices. It is about realizing that we exist in an interdependent world and that participating in an exchange of ideas and experiences is the only way to move forward as a global community. More than anything, it is about having a whole lot of fun and making new friends.

Insightful conversations with new friends (from over 30 countries!), St. Patty's day in the American Midwest, salsa dancing with my colleagues, enjoying Spanish Sangria and Dutch Stroopwafels at the EU Embassies with other fellows and cooking a big fat Mughlai meal for American friends are just few highlights from the past four months.

One event in particular best exemplifies the life of a citizen diplomat. On a beautiful weekend in March, I played Holi, the Indian festival of colors, at a Hindu temple with American friends, and the next day I ate a traditional Easter lunch and went on a scavenger hunt with a Christian family. The simple exchange of ideas and cultures over these two days was wonderful and truly special.

I know the remaining months will bring many more such amazing experiences, each unfamiliar and refreshing in its own way. I closely relate to USCCD’s mission and truly believe in the importance of what we're trying to accomplish.

Talking to someone from another country or culture will make you uncomfortable. I can tell you from experience that means it's going to be great! So go ahead. Get out today and say Hola… Namaste… Bonjour… Ni hao… Shalom… Hello… to the world!


*This blog was originally written for, and posted on, the U.S. Center for Citizen Diplomacy's website, along with this video from the first few days of my fellowship.

If men could menstruate...

"Whatever a "superior" group has will be used to justify its superiority, and whatever an "inferior" group has will be used to justify its plight."

http://www.haverford.edu/psych/ddavis/p109g/steinem.menstruate.html