I've often wondered what perpetuates what, especially when it comes to advertising. Surely, ideas and concepts are at first embedded in reality and therefore adopted, but over decades when these ideas and concepts begin to lose relevance, I'm sure that multiple artificial exposures to them in the form of adverts reinforce their existence in our consciousness.
For example, a desire for fair skin and it's direct correlation to a better spouse many decades ago had led companies to invent fairness creams. There was a clear demand for it, a massive market and a ready made rationale for its existence. The adverts portrayed only what was already existing in society and it was therefore acceptable. It reinforced people's desire for fair skin. Deep down, I want the perfect husband. It doesn't matter that according to myth and now television, his level of perfection is indirectly proportional to the darkness of my skin. It is on TV so it must be true. Thankfully, over the years, India grew up (well, a little anyway). Today, as people are becoming more independent and confident in their skin, the need for 'fairness' on the outside and acquiring a male partner as a life goal has diminished considerably (I know I speak of a certain section but spare me for the sake of exemplification and a larger point). When sales and conversion rates went down, marketers tweaked their ad campaigns to add the new life goals that had replaced older ones. Independent women of today wanted jobs and a career. Let's simply replace a perfect spouse with the perfect job. Let's add a pinch of parental pride and emotion into the mix. Genius. It isn't news that people are fairly impressionable when it comes to these things. That is the premise of marketing. So even if there was no evidence in my real life that I would or would not get a job because of my skin colour, now that it was being shown on TV it must be true. Therefore, I must run to the market and buy myself these miracle creams that will make my life bright and shiny and my parents proud. Marketers rejoiced in their cubicles as they feasted on the low self esteem and herd mentality of their target audience.
A fact that may have existed in society, got tweaked and twisted to yet another fact that would gain importance and recognition. An idea that rose to prominence from reality went to illusion to figment and again, to reality.
So what's perpetuating what, again? And what happened to social responsibility?
Friday, October 12, 2012
Saturday, September 22, 2012
Ideology vs Practicality
Randomized controlled trial for social policy and the need for evidence-based policies and interventions. Brilliant case studies and talk by Esther Duflo.
Some other great videos from Jacqueline Novogratz, founder of Acumen Fund and author of 'The Blue Sweater'.
Some other great videos from Jacqueline Novogratz, founder of Acumen Fund and author of 'The Blue Sweater'.
On escaping poverty
A third way to think about aid
Monday, September 17, 2012
Step One
I watch as Imran raises his hand impatiently, then waves it around in frantic desperation, worry etched across his face. He wants another samosa, even before the one in his hand is finished. He's concerned that they will all be over, and that there won't be enough for him. In that moment, it doesn't matter to him that fifteen other children are waiting to eat beside him, it doesn't matter that he's been reassured twice that there is more than enough food for everyone, and it doesn't matter that he's being selfish, impolite and greedy. It doesn't matter, because Imran comes from a family of six who live under a fly-over in South Delhi and more often than not, he doesn't get two full meals a day. He doesn't know polite. He knows that things are always limited, and that it takes a fight to secure even those basic things that his body craves by its very nature.
I watch as Khushi walks away from me shyly, secretly pleased that I've given her a star for her drawing and written her name on it for her. There's a sense of pride in her young eyes and something tells me it's a rare and confusing emotion for her. She goes back to sit with the other girls, tentatively lifting little scraps of paper and pasting them on her drawing. She is concentrating hard, making sure it is perfect. She might not be able to govern where she lives or the fact that she has to beg on streets to earn a living (hell, she doesn't even understand what that means at her age), but she does determine what happens on that piece of paper in her hand. Unlike her father's drinking habit and her mother's rage fits, this she has control over. And for once in her life, she feels like a child her age should - relaxed, excited and content.
I watch as Seher, only eight years old herself, consoles her wailing one year old brother. She has brought him to class because wherever she goes, he goes. Her mother works 14 hours a day to support all three of them; her father died in an accident in the village 8 months ago. Seven days a week, Seher roams the roads with her brother at her hip, knocking on car window after car window for as much as one rupee. She used to leave him with an aunt earlier, but that was before she realised that carrying him with her almost always resulted in higher earnings. It was then that she stopped thinking of him as a burden and began thinking of him as an asset. I wish I could explain to her that he's neither. He's just a child, and so is she.
I watch as Suraj glares at Roohi. Then, without flinching he grabs her hands and whacks her across her neck. She lets out a cry and before I can register what's happening she returns his cold stare and kicks him hard in the stomach. He is nine years old and she is seven. I shudder at their hostility, at the revenge and intolerance that burns in their eyes. This isn't a one-off incident. This is what they know. Violence, impatience and lack of control. They've seen their parents, their siblings and their friends do the same thing. It isn't unnatural for them. But it should be.
The stories above have been inspired by my observations at Khoj Foundation, an NGO that runs an education programme for street children in South Delhi (I volunteer there once a week). The names and background information are fictitious, but the situations and the thoughts they prompted are real. Working at Khoj has got me a step closer to achieving my dream of providing quality holistic education to underprivileged children across India.
I watch as Khushi walks away from me shyly, secretly pleased that I've given her a star for her drawing and written her name on it for her. There's a sense of pride in her young eyes and something tells me it's a rare and confusing emotion for her. She goes back to sit with the other girls, tentatively lifting little scraps of paper and pasting them on her drawing. She is concentrating hard, making sure it is perfect. She might not be able to govern where she lives or the fact that she has to beg on streets to earn a living (hell, she doesn't even understand what that means at her age), but she does determine what happens on that piece of paper in her hand. Unlike her father's drinking habit and her mother's rage fits, this she has control over. And for once in her life, she feels like a child her age should - relaxed, excited and content.
I watch as Seher, only eight years old herself, consoles her wailing one year old brother. She has brought him to class because wherever she goes, he goes. Her mother works 14 hours a day to support all three of them; her father died in an accident in the village 8 months ago. Seven days a week, Seher roams the roads with her brother at her hip, knocking on car window after car window for as much as one rupee. She used to leave him with an aunt earlier, but that was before she realised that carrying him with her almost always resulted in higher earnings. It was then that she stopped thinking of him as a burden and began thinking of him as an asset. I wish I could explain to her that he's neither. He's just a child, and so is she.
I watch as Suraj glares at Roohi. Then, without flinching he grabs her hands and whacks her across her neck. She lets out a cry and before I can register what's happening she returns his cold stare and kicks him hard in the stomach. He is nine years old and she is seven. I shudder at their hostility, at the revenge and intolerance that burns in their eyes. This isn't a one-off incident. This is what they know. Violence, impatience and lack of control. They've seen their parents, their siblings and their friends do the same thing. It isn't unnatural for them. But it should be.
Poverty leads to a variety of impairments that cripple human beings and societies alike. Children being robbed of their childhood is one of many heartbreaking consequences of poverty. Their potential is crushed before it can surface, their skins thicken to bear responsibilities too big for their tiny shoulders, and they're socialised into a tough and unjust world with no turning back. When I was placed in each of the above-described situations, I didn't ask myself how these children can learn, but how they can first unlearn and then relearn. Children living on the street grow up much before their time. Educating them is therefore a much more challenging task. It becomes doubly hard in a country where access to quality education is limited, to say the least. It has baffled and confounded me, preoccupying my thoughts for months. It's an unstructured, mobile and diverse group which makes it harder to draw out a common chart for development. Harder, but not impossible.
The stories above have been inspired by my observations at Khoj Foundation, an NGO that runs an education programme for street children in South Delhi (I volunteer there once a week). The names and background information are fictitious, but the situations and the thoughts they prompted are real. Working at Khoj has got me a step closer to achieving my dream of providing quality holistic education to underprivileged children across India.
Monday, August 27, 2012
Relative Misery Theory
I have a theory. It is that contrary to popular belief, misery does not in fact like company. "If it makes you feel any better...", "If it's any consolation...", honestly why should it be? If I am in a fix and so are you, it doesn't change how I feel about my situation. If anything, realizing that someone apart from me is also equally harrowed only adds to my frustration. It makes me fume doubly if we're both getting screwed by the same system. Of course, I feel bad that we're both in the same boat, but this isn't a more-the-merrier situation, so I'd happily throw you off (hoping you will swim to blissful success).
I'd rather hear good news about your situation, while I'm in a shitty one, because it gives me hope of getting out of mine. Good news always trumps bad news. Because if I've done badly in an exam, and years ago you also did badly in an exam and you relate the excruciating details of the terrible incident to me, then that just makes me dread my fate more. Contrarily, if you add that after that disappointing result you emerged as someone who looks-at-the-big-picture-instead-of-focusing-on-silly-things-like-exam-results, then I'll be happy to hear you out and will stop my excessive and futile worry. If there's a moral to your story or if nothing else, it'll at least give me a good laugh, then by all means, console away. If not, leave me be.
I'd rather hear good news about your situation, while I'm in a shitty one, because it gives me hope of getting out of mine. Good news always trumps bad news. Because if I've done badly in an exam, and years ago you also did badly in an exam and you relate the excruciating details of the terrible incident to me, then that just makes me dread my fate more. Contrarily, if you add that after that disappointing result you emerged as someone who looks-at-the-big-picture-instead-of-focusing-on-silly-things-like-exam-results, then I'll be happy to hear you out and will stop my excessive and futile worry. If there's a moral to your story or if nothing else, it'll at least give me a good laugh, then by all means, console away. If not, leave me be.
Friday, July 20, 2012
Hypocrisy
We're all so proud of this country we belong to; the diversity it represents and the culture that binds us all together. A life of isolation is impossible in a close knit country like India and like any other Indian I'm both used to, and indifferent to it now.
No. Scratch that. I'm not indifferent. In fact, I'm enraged by our society's double standards; a thing I have neither the acceptance nor the patience for. In a way, it's what inspired me to become a student of sociology; to understand how and why human behaviour is so inexplicably linked to one another; how a community that is so inter-dependent is also one that chooses to shun its own people. It baffles me that a society that puts such an incredible amount of pressure on its members to do what is (considered) acceptable and to avoid deviating from what is "right", is also one that continues to disappoint its members regularly by failing to uphold their dignity.
We live in a country where respect and tradition are held very highly by elders and decision makers. How then do they fail to bring justice to victims of the most basic human rights violations? Is our 'tradition' that fundamentally flawed? Isn't it about time we evolved as a society?
Enough has been written and said about the Guwahati gang molestation that was caught on tape and went viral. Honestly, I had nothing to say. In a way, what happened was both fortunate and unfortunate. Fortunate because it spiked consciousness and forced authorities to take quick action, but highly unfortunate because it took a scandalous visual of a too-common crime to ignite a thunderous response. What about the innumerable girls and women who continue to face brutalities every single day in the absence of a video camera? Why isn't the knowledge of the crime, its embarrassing regularity and its irreversible consequences enough for there to be strict action?
How is it that we take it upon ourselves to enter an individual's bedroom and dictate what course his/her life will take, but matters of safety and respect at large are conveniently ignored? The news of the recent UP Panchayat diktat has left me dumbfounded. Women in that village have been barred from using mobile phones, love marriages have been banned and women below 40 have been forbidden from going to the marketplace. Why? "Because this gives rise to crimes. They must also cover their heads FOR THEIR SAFETY". Why thank you, asshole. How about doing something that addresses the criminal instead of the victim for a change? How about shut-the-f**k up about my safety when it’s just an excuse for you to cover up the manifestations of your own flawed patriarchal beliefs and stereotypes?
Read about both these incidences in the same week and you know that India's development is in fact a much bigger issue than people make it out to be. How we wish it were just about economic development!
I know I sound harsh, but it is because I am tired of being angry. And trust me, it has been a while. I am a very proud Indian and I respect and love my culture. It bothers me no end to see my country's progress being stifled by its own societal norms and traditions. It bothers me no end that today, freedom and dignity are a far-away dream in this hypocritical society.
No. Scratch that. I'm not indifferent. In fact, I'm enraged by our society's double standards; a thing I have neither the acceptance nor the patience for. In a way, it's what inspired me to become a student of sociology; to understand how and why human behaviour is so inexplicably linked to one another; how a community that is so inter-dependent is also one that chooses to shun its own people. It baffles me that a society that puts such an incredible amount of pressure on its members to do what is (considered) acceptable and to avoid deviating from what is "right", is also one that continues to disappoint its members regularly by failing to uphold their dignity.
We live in a country where respect and tradition are held very highly by elders and decision makers. How then do they fail to bring justice to victims of the most basic human rights violations? Is our 'tradition' that fundamentally flawed? Isn't it about time we evolved as a society?
Enough has been written and said about the Guwahati gang molestation that was caught on tape and went viral. Honestly, I had nothing to say. In a way, what happened was both fortunate and unfortunate. Fortunate because it spiked consciousness and forced authorities to take quick action, but highly unfortunate because it took a scandalous visual of a too-common crime to ignite a thunderous response. What about the innumerable girls and women who continue to face brutalities every single day in the absence of a video camera? Why isn't the knowledge of the crime, its embarrassing regularity and its irreversible consequences enough for there to be strict action?
How is it that we take it upon ourselves to enter an individual's bedroom and dictate what course his/her life will take, but matters of safety and respect at large are conveniently ignored? The news of the recent UP Panchayat diktat has left me dumbfounded. Women in that village have been barred from using mobile phones, love marriages have been banned and women below 40 have been forbidden from going to the marketplace. Why? "Because this gives rise to crimes. They must also cover their heads FOR THEIR SAFETY". Why thank you, asshole. How about doing something that addresses the criminal instead of the victim for a change? How about shut-the-f**k up about my safety when it’s just an excuse for you to cover up the manifestations of your own flawed patriarchal beliefs and stereotypes?
Read about both these incidences in the same week and you know that India's development is in fact a much bigger issue than people make it out to be. How we wish it were just about economic development!
I know I sound harsh, but it is because I am tired of being angry. And trust me, it has been a while. I am a very proud Indian and I respect and love my culture. It bothers me no end to see my country's progress being stifled by its own societal norms and traditions. It bothers me no end that today, freedom and dignity are a far-away dream in this hypocritical society.
Friday, June 29, 2012
The itch
There are a million possible roads and only one you can take. How's that even fair? It appears that the 'limited-time-so-can't do everything' logic does considerably more to deter your every ambition, than inspire you to do something meaningful in the limited time that you have. Mostly, I find myself wishing I could do everything. There's no evidence to say I can. But then there isn't any to say I can't.
The itch refuses to subside. My mental list of things to do and places to see grows by the minute, as does the distance between my desired and current position. It's no longer about the right or wrong decision. It's about A decision. And the constant prodding by my friends Impatience and Uneasiness is enough indication that I owe one to myself. Soon.
The itch refuses to subside. My mental list of things to do and places to see grows by the minute, as does the distance between my desired and current position. It's no longer about the right or wrong decision. It's about A decision. And the constant prodding by my friends Impatience and Uneasiness is enough indication that I owe one to myself. Soon.
Monday, June 18, 2012
Keep a piece
I've come to realise that one of the most important things you need to do for yourself is the one I'm not entirely programmed for.
Preservation; the art of sparing or retaining a part of yourself in all that you do has somehow escaped the majority of my social and professional experiences. I've had the relationship that took priority over everything else, or the team I did absolutely everything for, or the job(s) I was over-committed to. And while all this makes me who I am and will probably never change completely, I've realized that in this world, intentions aren't everything. Perceptions are. You can't go overboard and you have to strike a balance. I guess everyone starts off that way - feeling too much, needing too much, doing too much. But while it's true that things external to us will always be important, it's truer that at the end of the day we're really on our own. And if we're really on our own, then is it fair to allow parts of our self to be frittered away with every milestone till all we're left with is missing pieces of a puzzle that once fit together to make us who we are?
Moral? Be fearless and honest and passionate. But keep a part of you, for you.
Preservation; the art of sparing or retaining a part of yourself in all that you do has somehow escaped the majority of my social and professional experiences. I've had the relationship that took priority over everything else, or the team I did absolutely everything for, or the job(s) I was over-committed to. And while all this makes me who I am and will probably never change completely, I've realized that in this world, intentions aren't everything. Perceptions are. You can't go overboard and you have to strike a balance. I guess everyone starts off that way - feeling too much, needing too much, doing too much. But while it's true that things external to us will always be important, it's truer that at the end of the day we're really on our own. And if we're really on our own, then is it fair to allow parts of our self to be frittered away with every milestone till all we're left with is missing pieces of a puzzle that once fit together to make us who we are?
Moral? Be fearless and honest and passionate. But keep a part of you, for you.
Monday, June 11, 2012
Idealism and social impact: the balancing act
Here's the thing. You can't not be an optimist when you're working in the development sector. The very word aims to drag you in the complete opposite direction of where pessimism resides. Having said that, all idealism and no reality check will pretty much always bite you in the bum. This article did a really good job of articulating just that.
http://www.nytimes.com/2012/04/13/opinion/brooks-sam-spade-at-starbucks.html?_r=3
At some point I will attempt to analyse and place this article in the Indian context, but for now copy pasting it is all my lazy self is allowing me to do.
http://www.nytimes.com/2012/04/13/opinion/brooks-sam-spade-at-starbucks.html?_r=3
At some point I will attempt to analyse and place this article in the Indian context, but for now copy pasting it is all my lazy self is allowing me to do.
Friday, May 18, 2012
Keep Calm and Love On
Yesterday was International Day Against Homophobia. Isn't that about the saddest thing? Imagine needing a day to remind people that you mustn't be afraid of love. I know I risk oversimplifying what I'm aware is a complex issue, but to me it really does boil down to that.
Man loves Woman
Man loves Man
Woman loves Woman
It shouldn't take a genius to identify that the only constant in this equation is also the only one that matters.
I wish people would just stop. Stop judging, stop hating, stop curbing, stop controlling. The right to love is so fundamental that it doesn't even need to be spelled out. No religion, no belief in the world can dictate how you love and who you love. If there is one thing this world needs - this world plagued by hate, fear, mistrust and conflict - it is love. In all it's amazing forms and shapes and sizes. It's something to celebrate, not condemn. Something to embrace, not renounce.
Love makes the world go round, and homophobes are just annoying and mislead obstacles in its way. I wish they'd stop wasting their time and ours, and indulge in some good old lovin' instead.
Wednesday, May 9, 2012
There are moments of crystal clarity. But they are brief and often washed away by waves of doubt and insecurity. It's a dizzying ride back to square one.
But in those moments of clarity, life makes sense. Reasons are clear, and if they aren't, there's satisfaction in the knowledge that you're exactly where you need to be. Life's good to you, and the best is yet to come.
Why Euphony and Cacophony? Because that's how I view this world. A whirlwind of extremes. And that's who I am. Restless and settled. Disappointed and hopeful. Confident and insecure. Reserved and ambitious.
But in those moments of clarity, life makes sense. Reasons are clear, and if they aren't, there's satisfaction in the knowledge that you're exactly where you need to be. Life's good to you, and the best is yet to come.
Why Euphony and Cacophony? Because that's how I view this world. A whirlwind of extremes. And that's who I am. Restless and settled. Disappointed and hopeful. Confident and insecure. Reserved and ambitious.
Communication is Powerful
Much like Mrs. Wang who was going to stop wars over a cup of tea, as a child, I used to believe that I could prevent someone from burgling my house by sitting down with him and talking him through the entire thing. I thought I'd be able to throw light on the impact it'd have on my family, and that he'd understand because he'd have a family and loved ones too. I thought I would reach out to him; talk to him and understand him like no one else had. "Because we are both human and regardless of our paths, communication is powerful," I'd tell myself. I was 100% convinced that I could do this. I'm not sure if I believe otherwise even now.
The video below just reminded me of how we can have various ways of expressing ourselves, but it's supremely important that we do. It isn't the best video I've ever seen, but a lot of things about it spoke to me. Here it is -
www.ted.com/talks/sarah_kay_if_i_should_have_a_daughter.html/
The video below just reminded me of how we can have various ways of expressing ourselves, but it's supremely important that we do. It isn't the best video I've ever seen, but a lot of things about it spoke to me. Here it is -
www.ted.com/talks/sarah_kay_if_i_should_have_a_daughter.html/
Monday, March 26, 2012
Dress for the life you want, not the life you have.
How often do we stop ourselves from doing something, only because it's new and unfamiliar? It doesn't fit into the life we've lived and gotten accustomed to for 20, 30, 50 years. We are born with a clean slate, and we layer on habits and tastes that are already present in the family, environment or society we're born into. It's who we are for a while, but it doesn't have to be who we are our whole life (if we don't want it to be). Over time we change, we become more us than we were when we were 10, or even 15. So then what stops us from becoming exactly who we want to be? From breaking away from acquired taste and customs and just living out what our heart truly desires?
I heard the quote in a movie once. "Dress for the life you want, not the life you have". It sort of became my motto (well, one of) because it's so true. It doesn't just apply to the way you dress, or the way you shop. It applies to everything! You can always improve the life you're living by incorporating things you love. There is never a good enough reason to perpetuate routine, if it doesn't make you happy anymore. Take conscious steps and actions to steer your life in the direction of the one you want.
We have one shot to write our story. It's important to remember that.
I heard the quote in a movie once. "Dress for the life you want, not the life you have". It sort of became my motto (well, one of) because it's so true. It doesn't just apply to the way you dress, or the way you shop. It applies to everything! You can always improve the life you're living by incorporating things you love. There is never a good enough reason to perpetuate routine, if it doesn't make you happy anymore. Take conscious steps and actions to steer your life in the direction of the one you want.
We have one shot to write our story. It's important to remember that.
Monday, February 20, 2012
Friday, January 27, 2012
"Life is what happens when you're busy making other plans"
Agreed. But does that mean you withdraw control completely and just sit back and let it happen? Or, does the 'ordeal of waking up in the morning-enduring an entire day of work you don't enjoy-returning home too exhausted to care about what you do and don't have control over' lead you to withdraw naturally, without thought or intention? Or sometimes, your life is governed by factors and entities that you can curse and resist, but never escape. A mixture of the last two are only too familiar.
Whatever the excuse, I don't accept the conclusion. What makes your life differ from another's? What makes one upbringing differ from another?
If you stop making decisions for the way your life is to be led, then you're being unfair to yourself and eventually those around you. For your personality is blocked from translating into a variety of rules and traditions that make you happy.
Make it a point to sit together every night for dinner. The one meal the entire family eats together. If not every day, then twice a week. Don't snap and fight or argue and critise. Just talk and comment or sit and listen.
What's the opposite of that? Eating meals like they're a huge burden. "What should be cooked?", "What do you, and you, and you want?" (x 7 x 30 x 365) "Where will you, and you, and you eat" (all different rooms). Sometimes you can't help this. It's a habit that's hard to break and exhausting to try again.
I think a family should eat together. I think a family should talk to each other. And if you live in a 21st century house, flooded with technology and distractions, and work in a mind-sucking job, then both can happen together. Afterall, how do you just go on with life without knowing your own family, only because you didn't try hard enough?
Whatever the excuse, I don't accept the conclusion. What makes your life differ from another's? What makes one upbringing differ from another?
If you stop making decisions for the way your life is to be led, then you're being unfair to yourself and eventually those around you. For your personality is blocked from translating into a variety of rules and traditions that make you happy.
Make it a point to sit together every night for dinner. The one meal the entire family eats together. If not every day, then twice a week. Don't snap and fight or argue and critise. Just talk and comment or sit and listen.
What's the opposite of that? Eating meals like they're a huge burden. "What should be cooked?", "What do you, and you, and you want?" (x 7 x 30 x 365) "Where will you, and you, and you eat" (all different rooms). Sometimes you can't help this. It's a habit that's hard to break and exhausting to try again.
I think a family should eat together. I think a family should talk to each other. And if you live in a 21st century house, flooded with technology and distractions, and work in a mind-sucking job, then both can happen together. Afterall, how do you just go on with life without knowing your own family, only because you didn't try hard enough?
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