Long Time Coming

Please tell me this is all a part of growing up, because the thought of being someone who I haven’t been for 22 years is a bit, no, very unsettling.

Does growing up and knowing yourself better directly imply that your tolerance for people unlike you decreases? I could mask it as “I’m self aware and honest and don’t see the point of pretending otherwise.” But honestly, it scares the hell out of me because I’ve been a pretty tolerant person my entire life. I’ve never passed extreme judgements or let anyone affect me to the extent of wanting to avoid their company at any cost. But that seems to be changing because I’ve honestly had enough.
Before this turns into an angst-y post which I don’t intend it to be, I’ll get down to what’s been pending for a while. The many developments over the past few months. The neglected mental notes to blog about the revelations that each development invited.

Feb 2011 I started interning at CARE India, this amazing international humanitarian organisation that works for the empowerment of the poorest and most marginalised communities in India, with special focus on women and girls. The gender angle naturally appealed to me, as did the scale and scope for impact. The three month internship had me doing all sorts of content development, event management, social media management and communications work. I don’t think I intend on making a career out of development communication but it was the perfect place for me at this point to gain a bird’s eye view of work across verticals (health, education, livelihoods and emergency). The highlight of the 3 months was most definitely my field trip to West Bengal towards the end of my internship where I travelled through the interior districts and acquired insights into a vicious but preventable cycle of social problems. (Hopefully, I’ll write a longer post on that soon)

Also during my internship, I met this amazing little girl in Ghaziabad where we run an HIV/AIDS project called EMPHASIS for migrant workers from Nepal and Bangladesh. I’d just begun working on my photography and I’ll always keep this photograph as a reminder. I can’t get over how beautiful she is.

June 2011, CARE offered me a consultant’s role which I accepted for 8 months till Jan ’12. My main responsibility is devising and launching a volunteer engagement programme for them. They’ve had nothing of the sort before so it’s more challenging and interesting which is why I took it up. I don’t know if I’ll continue after Jan but that’ll depend on a whole bunch of factors. Which brings me to my first edition of ‘Realisations of 2011' - The year so far.

1. The everlasting, havoc-inducing tug of war between development work and event management and travel journalism and fashion merchandising, has been resolved. I’m far too passionate about human/child rights and travelling to spend my life doing anything else. It comes down to being okay at something everyone’s doing as opposed to being excellent at the one thing you’re choosing to do (which I have tried to explain to my grandmother, to no avail).
2. If I were the sort to have an idol, it could be Audrey Hepburn.
3. What do you know! Social Work Does Pay *sarcasm aimed towards those who said I'd be a pauper for life* 
4. Relationships change. And sometimes there’s nothing at all you can do but watch it happen.
5. I’m made for development work because towards the end of what could easily be the most eye opening, pity/sympathy inducing and possibly, upsetting days of someone’s life (my field visit) I was more motivated than ever to make a difference. I really believe it’s possible because there’s just SO much to be done. Like I’ve always maintained – there’s something magical about the nature of humankind’s unwavering faith. Seeing what people have achieved without resources makes you think of how much they can with.
6. I need to watch movies. Regularly. If I don’t, I’m restless.
7. Yoga isn’t overrated at all. It’s really that amazing. In fact, I fully intend on going to Mcleodgang and doing a 2 month yoga course some day. But for now, classes at home will suffice.
8. If by next year I can’t narrow it down to a few universities and masters courses I’d like to apply for, and of course, figure out where the money for an education abroad is coming from (both very likely), I’ll apply for an overseas volunteer/internship/short-term job opportunity. Travel + Work Ex!
9. The most unfortunate realisation of all – the transition from ex-girlfriend to friend is never as easy as the transition from friend to girlfriend. History remains, feelings linger. For every 10 days you’re a friend, there will be 2 when you’re the ex (purely feelings-wise). This is quite a blow for someone who has spent years believing that friendship with exes minus the baggage was possible.
10. Sometimes - ignorance is bliss, it’s alright to be stubborn, it’s imperative to stand up for yourself and it’s therapeutic to let go.

As I expected, the post began with something and ended with something else entirely. This is what happens when I don’t write for too long and make post-its instead. Ah, well.

Little Miss Sunshine

As what might seem as a reiteration of an earlier post, I must declare - it takes so little to light up your morning!

I was driving down my normal route to work, mindlessly untangling a chain of desultory thoughts and before I knew it, I was at a red light. A glimse in the mirror, a glance at the phone, the customary song switch and a knock on my window. A tiny little sweetheart in torn clothes. Too young to be up at this hour. Too young to be begging to stay alive. The image crushed me and made me realise how much there was too be done for little children like the one who stared at me then with dark, beuatiful, pleading eyes. For a reason I still can't fathom, I skipped the usual chatter I initiate with these kids and just handed over 10 rupees. My mind was blank and I couldn't think beyond her sad eyes. All I could muster was a promise from her that she'd buy herself something to eat with the money, and would make sure she attended the evening school in her area. She agreed, her face lit up and she skipped off to another car, while I was left wondering what her life was like. 30 seconds later, I could see her looking at me in my rear view mirror. She had the most adorable smile on her face as she waved at me and I reciprocated with an even bigger smile. Just as I was driving off, she pursed her lips, raised her tiny palm and blew me a flying kiss. It was just the sweetest little thing!

Who says strangers can't leave good memories? Sometimes they leave the best :)

Engaging with Migrant Communities

My second article for the CARE India blog. It was preceded by a really interesting field trip to Shalimar Gardens, Ghaziabad, Uttar Pradesh (one of the project sites). I've been meaning to write about that visit for a while. But for now I just have time to copy, paste this -

Every year thousands of Nepalis and Bangladeshis migrate to India in search of employment and a better quality of life. Separation from spouses, families and familiar social and cultural norms, language barriers in the new environment, substandard living conditions and exploitative working conditions (including sexual violence) often result in isolation and stress leading migrants to engage in behaviours like unsafe casual or commercial sex, increasing their risk to HIV and AIDS. Moreover, due to inadequate access to HIV services and the fear of being stigmatized for seeking HIV-related information or support, the issue is largely ignored.

Asia constitutes 14.4% of the world’s people living with HIV/AIDS. While overall HIV prevalence is low in Bangladesh and Nepal, vulnerable mobile populations are increasingly forming a bridge from high prevalence areas of India back to Bangladesh and Nepal. To disrupt this vicious cycle, Enhancing Mobile Populations’ Access to HIV/AIDS Information and Services or EMPHASIS, a CARE project, uses the unique Community Life Competence Process (CLCP) approach which focuses on the strengths within a community as the primary step to tackle pertinent problems. The approach believes that “every community has the capacity to respond to life challenges, to build a common vision, to act and adapt.” Thus, through this approach, communities participate in the process of change rather than being mere recipients of the change. They are given a forum to voice their concerns and dreams, and over time they gain confidence in their own ability to recognize and overcome their problems. The approach seeps into the social fabric of the community ensuring sustainable impact that goes far beyond the project period.

Over the years, engagement with migrant communities has highlighted that though the problems and concerns of migrants coincide with those identified by EMPHASIS, there are many other deeper issues that need to be tackled beforehand. For example, migrant communities acknowledge health as an area of concern but it is a lower priority for them.

Deepak Chanda Rai, a young man from Mahendra Nagar village in western Nepal has been living in Shalimar Garden, Ghaziabad for 15 years. Highlighting his community’s concerns he says “We face a lot of discrimination. We are paid less than the normal salary because we are Nepali and we have no job security. Many times we are asked to produce ID cards stating that we live and work in India but there is no authority to help us attain this ID card so we are beaten mercilessly by people who think we are thieves. We can’t even purchase SIM cards without an ID card.”

Narendra Bhandari, another Nepali who has lived in many cities across India adds, “Nepali’s are denied basic human rights in India even though we have been working here for generations. Our children can not go to school because they do no have a birth certificate. Their health is neglected because we don’t have access to any facilities. All 5000 men in my community are guards who have to work 24 hours without a break. Our responsibilities are not defined; we are made to do extra work which interferes with our duties and if something goes wrong we are always blamed and punished. Now finally, with CARE’s help we are emerging as one community and have begun to think about solving our own problems.”